AMSTERDAM, Netherlands - Stung by public outrage, KLM Royal Dutch Airlines apologized Thursday for using a shredding machine to kill 440 Chinese squirrels shipped illegally to the Netherlands.

The Punchlines:

The airline then proceeded to begin the long task of taping the pieces back together. (burpolicious@hotmail.com)

But KLM still refuses to comment about the 30 illegal Chinese immigrants they clubbed with wooden shoes. (mrsbrak@aol.com)

The pilot later said, "I was wondering why I kept hearing the passengers screaming, 'AHHHH! My nuts!'" (arod984@aol.com)

In the future such squirrels will be sent back to China, where they will be run over by tanks. (dailyrich@aol.com)

They weren't flying squirrels. (lgwhite@prodigy.net)

Apparently "Fargo" was a big hit over in Europe. (fromagnon@hotmail.com)

KLM spokesman Maarten van Slijmball said in a statement, "This seems to have been a terrible accident, and we have officially suspended our company policy allowing 15 minute hash breaks." (katika1030@aol.com)

Public outrage quickly dissipated once KLM started to distribute hash and prostitutes on the house to those upset by the squirrel incident. (psite_runner@hotmail.com)

Later a flight attendant who wished to remain anonymous advised against choosing the chipped beef during meal service on KLM for the next few weeks. (aturton@email.com)

Nobody seemed to concerned about the guy with the flute that marched through the shredder first. (devhop@aol.com)

In the apology, the airline said they regretted the incident, but also mentioned that there is not much else you can do with a Chinese squirrel shredder. (willshgp@aol.com)

And from lsmorrow@mail.bfdmed.org, our 100 token winner!

KLM explained that the official was actually trying to fax the squirrels back to China but used the wrong machine.